My name is Firdauz,
and I love you, forever.
Each time i read your entries, i’ll be squeezing my ipod, running my thumb in circle, trying to find the perfect track to bring harmony — and the unity of all irony, to what i feel.
I’m feeling it like this, Sara : It was 10 days before your 20th birthday when you were diagnosed with stage 3B lung cancer; and you would say with your eyes, “My surprise came early this year.”
And your lips would blossom into a dazzling smile, like a flower who received rich sunshine you would say ” I’m special. God chose me. He loves me.”
And slowly, the cancer would chew on your lung, reaching to your heart, grabbing it by a tumor the size of love — big, destructive, but yet, it made you understand something that i don’t.
I’m writing this on my bed, Sara; and through the glass windows, i’m watching angry engines and furious headlights racing to the end of the highway. The room is a tad cold, i have a blanket to cover my feet, and i put two pillows to cushion my chest — i’m trying to soften the rough edges of my emotion, Sara. And i think, you have reached there, to the origin of my emotions, doesn’t it come from this heavy chest, Sara?
Where is the origin to what i feel, Sara. Is it not from this heavy chest?
You’re a young spirit, Sara. You died of lung cancer — and the irony of being a non-smoker — you fought it with happy days; happy days with a list of food that you missed eating, happy days with the loves of your life, happy days that went wrong.
Happy days that went wrong.
You’re a young spirit, you died of lung cancer, Sara. And you fought it with happy days; happy days that went wrong.
My name is Firdauz, Sara. And I love you, forever.
P/s: Wan Maisara Amirah @ Sara Aziz (xanga, blogspot, flickr, deviantart).
itu awek engkau ker? comel dan manis.
Tak. itu allahyarham Sara Aziz yang talented dalam byk perkara terutama sukan dan fotografi dan kuat menentang sakit cancer nya.
she’s a superwoman and i admire her strength, and i love her funny writings.
=(
The world mourns, I’m sure… You, my friend, are nothing but a great presence to her I’m sure.
*Silent moment*
She was and still is the strongest person I know :)
i miss her too…so much.and now i let out tears in my eyes..hmmmm.
http://www.xanga.com/atiesygs
*hugs firdy*
KY : =((((
chriso : thanks bro. i’d like to think that she lives forever, with us.
chingy : …
Mellisa : yes, she is. u’ve been a good friend to her, i think she’s proud of you, mel.
atie : hi atie. ur a personal friend of her issit?
pinky : *hugs pinky back*
I had the privilege to know her back during RANtAi, such a pretty, sweet, lovely and super talented young lady. I was amazed at her photos. Was truly impressed. I left her a note in her guest book, and she did in mine too.
Hmm. It’s just a weird feeling you can’t get over someone the passing of someone so young kan? And reading all the condolences at her chatbox semua. Then reading what she wrote in her blogs, seeing the pictures she took. Kinda makes you stop and think how things would be if it was us instead. And what is actually going on the other side, and are we really ever ready for whatever lies beyond?
Really amazed as to how strong she was and positive about life. Definitely a superwoman I agree.
oh hi Anna,
i’d like to think that sara aziz, is the epitome of love, femininity and eternal happiness. her talent to love, to smile and to take photos and her passion to live and to achieve great things in life, are not only natural — it’s the most romantic thing that still exists beyond films and fictional stories.
sara aziz, is the epitome of love, femininity and eternal happiness. i’d like to think it that way.
i heard that she had cancer since she was 13.
she’s brave enough to fight the disease but then all her pain was slowly taken away.
God loves you,Sara.
you are a talented photographer and your smile is always in my mind.
al-fatihah.
my friend named siti sara, passed away too. she was 19, it was after merdeka, and she passed away on 8 sept. few more months to go to millennium and she didn’t make it.
her blood clot burst.
she was my guide to anything religious, and she didn’t have a blog but she had many friends. i always call ajue on every sept 8th just to remember about sara and let our other friends back in college, sheila and sharlini know about it as well.
still can’t believe it’s almost 10 years she’s gone.
she loves tulip very very much. and i still keep the polystyrene cut that she made for me that bears my name.
Shaza : i’ve never heard of that. she had cancer since she was 13? she has a family you know. and friends. don’t be so quick to travel words, although i do understand ur intention is to describe how strong she was. that’s a sweet intention, but, keep the facts correct?
Ebb : =(. ur a lovely friend, u have always been the loveliest one.
felt the same as Anna felt. Reading over the blogs/journals of someone who left many memories/pictures.. tells the living, how she live her life and she’s so strong can’t see any negative emotion.
hi tekong, lama tak jumpa kamu
hahah
well i think there’s nothing had ever brought any misery 2 my life,
same as when i lost my only sister,
when i lost my best friend.it was a shock to lost 2 MOST important persons, in a very short time.
Arwah Kak Rai left me suddenly by 17th May 08.
she was at Melaka dat time n i cant come.
juz my tears followed her.
she died of ca crash.
Dj was by my side dat time, makes me calm, comfort me.bring my sunshine back.
i was really excited 2 go 2 her bday party, 3rd June.but i can’t.
n the nest day, 4th of June 08..guess what,
the news dat she’s left me arrived.i really can’t say anything.
yeah, she died of car crash, too.
can u see dat?
but really, u cant imagine.
to lost most important persons.
n guess what, i dun believe dat they were gone actually.
i think they were juz wandering around.
Al-Fatihah
yeah,dude.im her personal friend….it’s so sad dat i didnt get to meet her during her last days…i regret it.BIG REGRET.
Moon : hi moon. i actually have lost a member from my family as well. it was my stepdad. it was hard for my mother. so when my mother took care of him in the hospital (for about 2 months), slept and stayed there, i was always there for my mother. i slept in the hospital too, taking care of my mother’s needs. i think i understand u, because if i were to tell you the longer version of this, the financial crisis and all those dramas, i bet you’ll cry for my mom. u stay strong okay.
Atie : it’s okay atie. i’m sure things happen for a reason.
=[
She sounds like a really great person.
she is actually =)
is that sara who used to study in australia?is her kampong at kelantan?
if it is, she was my emmm, dua pupu…i hardly know her,but its so sad to lost sumone at her age..
al fatihah for her..
yes, it could be ur cousin, sara
pray for her okay